The question is itself defining the thought that today i am going to scratch the old happenings of my life...at the same time question arises that why at this stage...? Why not earlier..? Whats the worth of this discussion ..?Does i am going to change anything or i want to regret for something ...? In all the cases the ans of mine will be a big NO...Then what the reason that we all are scratching our head collectively for getting those thought which can never be realized now.May be they can be done earlier, may be few of them can even today be realized partially..But is it the right time...?
The ans of all these questions come in one line only... that, what if we can re live the life what if we don't have the reverse button but one thing which we can do at any instant of time is to remember the mistakes we had done in past and to testify that neither we will committee that again nor we allow others to make such a blunder in their life's .....so my story start from here .
From this point what i can recall is my "lower prep" at the age of 4 when i had the fear that i have to sing a poetry at the school stage on 15 August...and from that day onward i did this job as many time as many celebration the dais of school has seen then after my college and finally my university has gone through the same replication.Every time i had something to say to my colleagues friends and to the other renowned persons of the gathering ...slowly i got stuck with the feeling that i have a great Anchor in me so at the level of class 8th i though i will become the News reader as that was the only place i knew for those who speaks and speaks brilliantly.
Here one thing is worth mentioning that i belong to family which can be put in the lower middle class where the fight is for living the life with proper prestige and nourishment is ever lasting so there is no place for fatal thoughts and silly dreams and even the parents don't know much about the fuddy duddy of life. The same happened with me,the would be Television Anchor when he suddenly thought and dreamed that Why not i add one extra diction in my name which will give me much money and power than a news reader as there parent also wanted the same from him....and thus i planned for that leaving the dream of becoming an anchor into the dustbin.
I never knew or realized it but people used to say me that i am good at Mathematics and then i thought that this DICTION can be "Er." and so i opted for engineering and got stuck with the dream of IIT as common as sun rises in the east. And then i realized that i was never good in mathematics so the story turns into the sad segment and after spending two lovely years of life while making cassetles in the air with the mask of IIT preparation. So the ramification of all this became like CANCER for my career and in the private engg college i lost all my love for studies and started doing all the extra study affairs....thank god i had done something right :-)) and from here the journey starts which told me at every stoppage of first year, second year then consecutively in the later years that, Engg was never the tea of my cup and i have to choose something else...
But the question even today remains the same ....Choose WHAT?...At this level when i have a master degree, when i already lived 24 years of my life without earning a good amount of happiness for my family what i can start..? Does it will be a right thing ....what's the guarantee that after adopting something new i will be able to get all my dreams...what if i again want to quit...?There are some of the questions which always tees me lot whenever i want to put my dreams forward....
I Know many people are suffering from the same condition of dilemma but why...shouldn't it be removed. Can't we put the gears in our life.If yes then when we will start ?..from our TOMB ...no ?
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