My Story

बड़ी आधी अधूरी ख्वाहिशों में…
बड़े बेचैन से इन रास्तों में…
बहुत तनहा सफ़र की बोरियत में …
बड़े बेजान से इन काफिलों में…
मैं अपनी दुनिया ढूंढता हूँ…
मैं अपने रस्ते चल रह हूँ….
यही है बस मेरा सारा मुकद्दर….
यही है बस मेरी पहचान भी अब..
तुम्हें आना है मेरे साथ आओ…..तुम्हें जाना है मुझसे दूर जाओ |

मुझे शिकवा नहीं कोई किसी से…
मुझे हैरत नहीं है जिंदगी से…
मैं अपनी चालें चल रहा हूँ…
तुम अपनी चालें चलते जाओ…
यही है बस मेरा सारा मुकद्दर….
यही है बस मेरी पहचान भी अब..
तुम्हें आना है मेरे साथ आओ…..तुम्हें जाना है मुझसे दूर जाओ |

When inspiration really helps…. you??

Today i read DNA. As they claim that they are number one in the india’s economic capital and they are trying to be the same in india’s IT hub. And being their one of the promoters and privileged card holder i am more of bothered than happy to read news paper DNA which is all because of the 300 bucks which i paid for the initial one year subscription of DNA. Whatever….. Today i am more of feeling thankful after reading the days news paper actually when there will be new news in the press at this time of .30AM.

This is all because i had my eyes on the headline which were really bold to take me there and compelled me to write… And the headlines were “A dad’s talk” by india’s IT synonm as we say in terms of DBA(data base administrator… :P though i am really odd in that… but what say if my job title is that..) Mr Narayan Murthy. I am really not into the big picture of Mr Murthy and neither of his big deal of making india as one of the finest IT Giant. But i really inspired by the few lines he old during the interview and i felt like the finest interview from past few months which i read. That not only inspired me but also made me compell to stroke my keys of imagination to the wordpress.

And then the story continues… as i went through another section of DNA which was more of my liking …. writers and blogs and then i found a new truth or better if i say a new fact that who was the father of blogging in india? And DNA replies none other than Amti Verma. The writer of india uncut.

Of course two consicutive electric shock no one can bear and specially if the electricity is of inspiration. And same happened to me ….

Narayan Murthy says that at every place you have a chance to add value to your system you are living in… and my mom says the moment you realize you have a responsibility to the happiness you got from us for sustaining them and to send that back to us… will be the day when you will add the value not to the system but also to the universe you are living in.

Amit Varma says that he will be more happy if he will be know for being novelist than the blogger….. i must say my mom will reply back to me that i will be more happy if you will be know for the values you had when you were young accompnied the values which you had earned by your experiences, as there is no hard and fast or thin or fat line to distinguish among the name as long as you are holding the value.

Though i know i am becoming older and at this point of time changing the priorities and dreaming with the others whims and fancies will be difficult but even i am then i am not seeing any harm as long as i am true enough to the inspiration which is driving me for this. And otherwise i will always have a chance to call Ekta Kapoor and then she will surely make a twist that everybody will accept. After all she is a drama queen.

At last but not the least… i hope that you will not change yoursself the way indian economy is changing… as then there will always be a chance of STANDBY. And in a life you really dont want any STANDBY.

Dreams ... which are still in pipeline....

I don't know how many times a living creation of god files the pleasure of ORGASM, but one thing on which i can bet is that ... more than that i felt the pleasure of being motivated and consequently being excited. It could be a impact of movie... an interview... a song... a television add, a book or any persons incredible work anything. But the consequences were always similar... that i too need to do something and this something is a thing which is i believe still unclear. Even at the age of 25 i don't know much about my vision and mission and so as many of us. These last couple of words make many of us idle as .. if no one else is bothered why should i ?

Then you are right my friend... as we all know that more than 97 percent of ppl are being caricatured by the rest. And this is because.. they don't have the crieteria matching with the above which i stated. And also as we all are aware and still belongs to the same 97 percent of population because... there is no reason to fight for the dreams as we are happy with what we all are having.

May be i have criticized myself many times in the blog but this time i am not criticizing my self, it is about we all as we all makes each other.. so there is a fair enough chance that some one of us could make the other one stimulated.

The fight of marriage

Sounds interesting... ya it is ..
Sounds unfamiliar.... no not exactly...
Sounds spicy.... ya it could be...
It is a real filmy thing that two lovers dying for each other ...

Orkut : About Myself

Tough....Split personality victim...Combo of love and hate...Trial version of Windows XP...Error handler of Friends.... Exception Handler for Girls...NotifyAll for breaking news...Runnable if you are relying upon.... Garbage collector if you are concerned about memory.... Polymorphism if you are looking for friend... Deadlock if you are looking for studies...... All in all ...

I am Java...
---------------------------------------------

Rest.....for girls

If i send you a friend request it doesn't mean that i am [:P]
Yaar reason is simple enough i want to make my wife jealous and that's it..... [:P] and haan one more thing you are chooooooo chweet that though i tried but was not able to resist my self.. then i took permission from my heart and send it to you



"तुम्हारी याद में एक ख़त "



आज कुछ अजीब सा हूँ मैं...बोझिल सा थका हुआ
शायद कुछ खो गया है मेरा...
या शायद जिंदगी नाराज है मुझसे...या शायद कोई और वजह है |

यूँ तो सब वैसा ही है पहले जैसा .... पर आदतें अजब सी लग रहीं हैं..
दिल तो अब भी वही है पर क्योँ लगता है जैसे..
ख्वाहिशें अजब से हैं...
हो सकता है वो याद आ रही है इसलिए...
या ये भी हो सकता है की मैं उस से दूर आ गया हूँ इसलिए...
जो भी हो कुछ वजह भी और कोई सिरा भी है |

शाम उसको देखो तो कुछ पहचाना सा लगा ...
वो अनजाना सा चेहरा कुछ जाना पहचाना सा लगा..
वही हरकत .... वो शरारत... वो मासूम सा भोला सा मुखडा ...
बिलकुल अपने आशियाने सा लगा |

सच में अगर ये मोहब्बत की शुरुआत है तो पडाव क्या होंगे...मंजिलें क्या होंगी...
और तब क्या होगा जब हम साथ होंगे...
एक दुसरे के साथ होंगे.... कुछ तो होगा....कुछ नया ....अजब सा ...
जिसकी कोई वजह नहीं होगी..जो बस होगा...होने के लिए...
खो जाने के लिए...और शायद...
ये कहने के लिए...


" की दूर तो हैं तुमसे हम .. पर मोहब्बत पे रश्क रखना.....
गर जमाना खिलाफत में है .. जमाने से शर्त रखना..
इश्क गर है खुदा तो खुदा संभालेगा...
बस जरा ये करना.. कि हौसले बुलंद रखना... "

You never know when dreams follow you...

I know it's different ..... much different than the normal philoshphy. But i feel that it is true. May be the poll about the topic will put me at the back, still i have a strong support about it. And certainly i have few logic about it.

If we say that people in this world are destined to their destiny. It means i am right.

If we say that every one is different... then i have my question that in which sense and if your answer is that "many of the cases". Then i must say that you too believe on me.

And yes in this world your desires and the subconscious mind pulls you all the way you travel. Which we say that we are driven by our heart means no one else than our dreams are chasing us and they have steering in their hands.

So i am not bothered at all as i know if at some point of time i will not be able to conquer my goal then at the very next point my goal will make me conquer. As this not the exclusion of my goal .. my dream with me... it's the mutual thing which is driving us.

For someone with love:

जरा सी सांस कम होगी तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ....
मेरी आवाज कम होगी तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ......

तुम्हें एहसास मुमकिन है न होजं इतनी मोहब्बत का .....
बहुत सी आँख नम होंगी तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ...

मिले दो पल हंसा कर चल दिए यूँ बेवफाई से ...
हंसी सब भूल जायेंगे तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ....

ये सपना था, हकीकत थी, मुझे इस से नहीं मतलब ..
ख़ुशी की रात कम होंगी.. तुम्हारे दूर जाने से.....

वो हर एक बात पे हँसना हँसाना गुन गुना जाना....
कहाँ ये बात होगी अब तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ......

चलो तकदीर में इतना सही इतना मिला हमको ....
हमें मत भूल जाना तुम मगर यूँ दूर जाने पर......

My Girl and My Girl Friends..Mery vidhaniyaan

Many times i thought of putting this idea on my page .... but don't know why i stopped myself... may be the fear that i will loose something, may be something else... but today when i am over pouring my self with the emotions of my love for my girl i am putting some of the vibes of my emotional and girly life.....

From the childhood only my dream was never of becoming a doctor or engineer or anyone having great post or something. But on the contrary i always wanted a friend and being very specific i wanted a girl friend as i always afraid that "Kahin aisa na ho jaaey ki saari khoobsoorat ladkiyaan kisi na kisi ke sath engage ho jaayain" so due to this fear only this dream always had the most influential backup. If i am not wrong i realized this first time when i was only in class 5th. There was one girl "Riya" whom i consider as my first crush. And the reason why i realized that was came to my notice when i left the college and in the consequence i wrote my first poetry. Which was basically a parody .. still the romance and fantasy rolls up in my life. And from the onward i always tried to focus on the one who can be the best suitable one for my life which would be going to begin after 12 or 13 years.

Then the second big crush came when i saw her during my college competition of Debate and she came second and fortunately i came first. Her name was "------". This crush remains like this until today. Sometimes even today when i go by the same way she supposed to live i wonder that my eyes are looking and my heart is praying to god for her one glimpse.

Then the third and the finest came when i proposed her "My college junior". But the same result as the proposal was so unromantic that all my theory of romanticism got vanished up. And the result is that even today .. people used to call me the man of failure. Though i know i am still looking to see her so what if she is engaged or something. Friendship was the thing for which i proposed her and i still have the same option open. And this is the soul reason that when ever i pass through "BTM" my eyes giggled to look for her.

And finally my girl came into the picture whom i never proposed neither she did.. but our thoughts, emotions. choices everything got glued up and then only we come to know that ya... this is what i was looking for. Today When she is looking so gorgeous, so beautiful, so cute, and so..[i know that i am not having words to describe] i am missing her. I know everyone in the crowd will be looking at you but from each and every eyes only i am seeing you jaan. No one else in the world has right to see you as i am seeing you, as i am feeling you. Jaan you know this is the night when for each and every moment i am feeling that i am away from you, as i am dying for you, as i am no one without you, so incomplete, so absurd, so fade and what else. This is you who are making me colourful. This is you due to whom i can laugh, i can confidently live and survive. I am missing you jaan more than any other day ... i know you are busy... i know you are missing me too ... but jaanu aaj kasam se bilkul bhi man nahi ker raha hai ki main ek pal bhi rahun tumhare bina.. as it is like walking on the dark road with the fearful voice of wind and cloud. And i can't tackle.

Jaanu .... i am waiting for you. I know that even my try for the nap is not going to help me as i am putting you in my and then i am here but you please make it sure to come back soon. As i know that you too are missing me more than anything.


Love you jaan.