Dreams ... which are still in pipeline....

I don't know how many times a living creation of god files the pleasure of ORGASM, but one thing on which i can bet is that ... more than that i felt the pleasure of being motivated and consequently being excited. It could be a impact of movie... an interview... a song... a television add, a book or any persons incredible work anything. But the consequences were always similar... that i too need to do something and this something is a thing which is i believe still unclear. Even at the age of 25 i don't know much about my vision and mission and so as many of us. These last couple of words make many of us idle as .. if no one else is bothered why should i ?

Then you are right my friend... as we all know that more than 97 percent of ppl are being caricatured by the rest. And this is because.. they don't have the crieteria matching with the above which i stated. And also as we all are aware and still belongs to the same 97 percent of population because... there is no reason to fight for the dreams as we are happy with what we all are having.

May be i have criticized myself many times in the blog but this time i am not criticizing my self, it is about we all as we all makes each other.. so there is a fair enough chance that some one of us could make the other one stimulated.

The fight of marriage

Sounds interesting... ya it is ..
Sounds unfamiliar.... no not exactly...
Sounds spicy.... ya it could be...
It is a real filmy thing that two lovers dying for each other ...

Orkut : About Myself

Tough....Split personality victim...Combo of love and hate...Trial version of Windows XP...Error handler of Friends.... Exception Handler for Girls...NotifyAll for breaking news...Runnable if you are relying upon.... Garbage collector if you are concerned about memory.... Polymorphism if you are looking for friend... Deadlock if you are looking for studies...... All in all ...

I am Java...
---------------------------------------------

Rest.....for girls

If i send you a friend request it doesn't mean that i am [:P]
Yaar reason is simple enough i want to make my wife jealous and that's it..... [:P] and haan one more thing you are chooooooo chweet that though i tried but was not able to resist my self.. then i took permission from my heart and send it to you



"तुम्हारी याद में एक ख़त "



आज कुछ अजीब सा हूँ मैं...बोझिल सा थका हुआ
शायद कुछ खो गया है मेरा...
या शायद जिंदगी नाराज है मुझसे...या शायद कोई और वजह है |

यूँ तो सब वैसा ही है पहले जैसा .... पर आदतें अजब सी लग रहीं हैं..
दिल तो अब भी वही है पर क्योँ लगता है जैसे..
ख्वाहिशें अजब से हैं...
हो सकता है वो याद आ रही है इसलिए...
या ये भी हो सकता है की मैं उस से दूर आ गया हूँ इसलिए...
जो भी हो कुछ वजह भी और कोई सिरा भी है |

शाम उसको देखो तो कुछ पहचाना सा लगा ...
वो अनजाना सा चेहरा कुछ जाना पहचाना सा लगा..
वही हरकत .... वो शरारत... वो मासूम सा भोला सा मुखडा ...
बिलकुल अपने आशियाने सा लगा |

सच में अगर ये मोहब्बत की शुरुआत है तो पडाव क्या होंगे...मंजिलें क्या होंगी...
और तब क्या होगा जब हम साथ होंगे...
एक दुसरे के साथ होंगे.... कुछ तो होगा....कुछ नया ....अजब सा ...
जिसकी कोई वजह नहीं होगी..जो बस होगा...होने के लिए...
खो जाने के लिए...और शायद...
ये कहने के लिए...


" की दूर तो हैं तुमसे हम .. पर मोहब्बत पे रश्क रखना.....
गर जमाना खिलाफत में है .. जमाने से शर्त रखना..
इश्क गर है खुदा तो खुदा संभालेगा...
बस जरा ये करना.. कि हौसले बुलंद रखना... "

You never know when dreams follow you...

I know it's different ..... much different than the normal philoshphy. But i feel that it is true. May be the poll about the topic will put me at the back, still i have a strong support about it. And certainly i have few logic about it.

If we say that people in this world are destined to their destiny. It means i am right.

If we say that every one is different... then i have my question that in which sense and if your answer is that "many of the cases". Then i must say that you too believe on me.

And yes in this world your desires and the subconscious mind pulls you all the way you travel. Which we say that we are driven by our heart means no one else than our dreams are chasing us and they have steering in their hands.

So i am not bothered at all as i know if at some point of time i will not be able to conquer my goal then at the very next point my goal will make me conquer. As this not the exclusion of my goal .. my dream with me... it's the mutual thing which is driving us.

For someone with love:

जरा सी सांस कम होगी तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ....
मेरी आवाज कम होगी तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ......

तुम्हें एहसास मुमकिन है न होजं इतनी मोहब्बत का .....
बहुत सी आँख नम होंगी तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ...

मिले दो पल हंसा कर चल दिए यूँ बेवफाई से ...
हंसी सब भूल जायेंगे तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ....

ये सपना था, हकीकत थी, मुझे इस से नहीं मतलब ..
ख़ुशी की रात कम होंगी.. तुम्हारे दूर जाने से.....

वो हर एक बात पे हँसना हँसाना गुन गुना जाना....
कहाँ ये बात होगी अब तुम्हारे दूर जाने से ......

चलो तकदीर में इतना सही इतना मिला हमको ....
हमें मत भूल जाना तुम मगर यूँ दूर जाने पर......

My Girl and My Girl Friends..Mery vidhaniyaan

Many times i thought of putting this idea on my page .... but don't know why i stopped myself... may be the fear that i will loose something, may be something else... but today when i am over pouring my self with the emotions of my love for my girl i am putting some of the vibes of my emotional and girly life.....

From the childhood only my dream was never of becoming a doctor or engineer or anyone having great post or something. But on the contrary i always wanted a friend and being very specific i wanted a girl friend as i always afraid that "Kahin aisa na ho jaaey ki saari khoobsoorat ladkiyaan kisi na kisi ke sath engage ho jaayain" so due to this fear only this dream always had the most influential backup. If i am not wrong i realized this first time when i was only in class 5th. There was one girl "Riya" whom i consider as my first crush. And the reason why i realized that was came to my notice when i left the college and in the consequence i wrote my first poetry. Which was basically a parody .. still the romance and fantasy rolls up in my life. And from the onward i always tried to focus on the one who can be the best suitable one for my life which would be going to begin after 12 or 13 years.

Then the second big crush came when i saw her during my college competition of Debate and she came second and fortunately i came first. Her name was "------". This crush remains like this until today. Sometimes even today when i go by the same way she supposed to live i wonder that my eyes are looking and my heart is praying to god for her one glimpse.

Then the third and the finest came when i proposed her "My college junior". But the same result as the proposal was so unromantic that all my theory of romanticism got vanished up. And the result is that even today .. people used to call me the man of failure. Though i know i am still looking to see her so what if she is engaged or something. Friendship was the thing for which i proposed her and i still have the same option open. And this is the soul reason that when ever i pass through "BTM" my eyes giggled to look for her.

And finally my girl came into the picture whom i never proposed neither she did.. but our thoughts, emotions. choices everything got glued up and then only we come to know that ya... this is what i was looking for. Today When she is looking so gorgeous, so beautiful, so cute, and so..[i know that i am not having words to describe] i am missing her. I know everyone in the crowd will be looking at you but from each and every eyes only i am seeing you jaan. No one else in the world has right to see you as i am seeing you, as i am feeling you. Jaan you know this is the night when for each and every moment i am feeling that i am away from you, as i am dying for you, as i am no one without you, so incomplete, so absurd, so fade and what else. This is you who are making me colourful. This is you due to whom i can laugh, i can confidently live and survive. I am missing you jaan more than any other day ... i know you are busy... i know you are missing me too ... but jaanu aaj kasam se bilkul bhi man nahi ker raha hai ki main ek pal bhi rahun tumhare bina.. as it is like walking on the dark road with the fearful voice of wind and cloud. And i can't tackle.

Jaanu .... i am waiting for you. I know that even my try for the nap is not going to help me as i am putting you in my and then i am here but you please make it sure to come back soon. As i know that you too are missing me more than anything.


Love you jaan.

Two Flats...Two Nights...What a fun...... :P

Topic may look odd...may lead you towards an uncertain declaration for me but truly friends nothing is like that.....and really i am not as odd as the "Fashion " guys were or it will be more appropriate if i would say that fashion gays were .

From past many days i was bogged up with the crappy office life and really needed some energy boosters for me so that i can carry on with the same creativity i had and this is common to the life also, after a hectic schedule of life we always need a change, specially when you are going for a big one. This is something which is not exclusive in my case but in case of every professional or unprofessional individual. I knew it better that the start of this month up to the mid i am going to puzzle my self a lot, as so called RCM (D firing test) is being fixed for 13th of the month. So i thought of playing good with myself and decided that i will spend two of my beautiful night with the few of most admirable peoples and i did the same. One night i was in Koramangla "A Small NIT Allahabad" and the other night i was in BTM "A small MIT Moradabad".

I don't know what it was, why i had decided these two places, why couldn't i went to some remote place where learning from the destiny was easy. But OK at the time when i am writing this, i can feel it that the decision was right. Living in two different lifestyles in such a shorter span of time is really inspiring, lively and for a change good also. At one place the life was all about fun and at other it was funny. So no difference but yes your perception can make it different. I am not judging the two ways as both are leading towards a destination and neither comparing them. The only thing which i could do is to analyze, feel and adopt and that is what i am doing now. And i have a one liner for this "Life is all about understanding it, perception and living it." And so i lived it.

Partying in one of the most hanging around place like "Chandni chauk" then sitting around the smoky and drunked circle and participating in the olden, golden chit chatts about the past we lived and more over anything, pulling the legs of each other without any reasons and logic's for just one chill and light moment and loud loughs. But it was good. I loved that. And i really cherished it. Thanx ASHU : DOUBT.

Unfortunately movies, songs and philosophy states that every night has a morning and thus i wake up as my morning was ringing in my phone and my lovely would be was cursing me with her sweetheart tips of early to bed, early to rise makes man healthy, wealthy and wise. Though i know she was right enough but i can't help it sorry jaan. But for sure Sunday is yours.

By d way i was talking about the lovely Saturday i spend with my childhood friends and enemies [:P]. Yes i believe if you have a good friend you don't need for an enemy as he is the best for that also as he knows you and helps you in that also. So i went there with all my best fit things as now i have to live the life i always wanted. And here it goes. I went there, and surprise they all were waked up. My god, how come and then.......i come to know about the truth the laziest person lost something and they were looking for that. But whatever ...i got the easy access to facility as they all were set. And then i recollected the schedule of the day that i got enough time to sleep, to fight for thought and to request them for moving out. It is good because then only i realized how tough it is to convince people and to work in a team. Though i always felt that i am good in team work. But when i am talking about this place i am worst better if i say ....that i am frust. [:P].

Finally the time came when after a lot of discussion and plots i convinced them to move for the crazy concept of "Madhur Bhandharkar" d "Fashion" and believe me the movie was good enough to be forgotten in the theater itself as nothing new nothing memorable was there except if i say that after i long time i had seen a beautiful bhabhi. [:P]. Jo bhi tha....it was fun with the flashback of my life. And thank god that when i came back to room a great movie was aired "Izzazat" and that was the finishing touch. But before i end i must say one thing which Rekha told to Nasseruddin Sah: "Aadat chali jaati hai per adhikaar nahi jaate."

And finally........ I have something for the flat owners....

मेरा कुछ सामान, तुम्हारे पास पडा है
सावन के कुछ भीगे भीगे दिन रखे है
और मेरे एक खत में लिपटी रात पडी है
वो रात बुझा दो, मेरा वो सामान लौटा दो

Good Night.

From India to Japan: A journey

I hope this topic does not require any introduction. As the person about whom i am talking is implicit. Yes he is none other than the " Plan Man of Our Group".

Before i start writing it i have a moral as well as legal warning for you guys that all the thoughts are fictitious and there is no link in between the lines written here to any of the living or nonliving objects :) . If any resemblance is found then it will be treated mere as a coincidence.

So the story begins like this:

This was summer of 2002, more hot, more lethargic and more tough than any other summer. Sun was like the booming economy of India. As the time passes from morning 9 am to 12 am, so as the share market grows up to the unexpected height and so as the heat produced by the sun. May be both were competing with each other or may be India was heading towards the economic reform and the atmoshperic deform. Any thing.

Same year few fresh minds were destined to meet, to collaborate, to vacillate and for lot's of other task together. Place was moradabad . A place which was well know for the communal disharmony, which was well known for the Green Belt of farming it had and more over any thing if a say in one word it is city of brass. Yes this was BRASS CITY MORADABAD.

At the outskirts of this place which was newly developed .... with the ambiance of River RAMGANGA which is some how linked with the holy river ganga. With the fragrance of all greenery and the belt of wheat and mustard there was one place which was neither enough old nor new but OK this was good.. as all those who failed for IIT's thinks this can be the next place from where they can jump and they can again get there safe future. Yes this was MIT Moradabad. A 1996 estd college. College was having good repo in all the private colleges and was a good destination in between Delhi and Lucknow the two hubs of education.

They all were fresh enough to sing the song "Aankhon main sapne liye ghar se hum chal to diye" and this way the story begins though this was the huge crowd as doing an engineering was no more a specific course to be done it was mere a status symbol to attain so many of those who wanted to do a simple graduation for the shake of their family status opted for engineering and thus the crowd was divide in two one Hostalids and other one Localids. The line which i mentioned couple of heights above is more applicable to the second group. Though after joining the college life both the groups were having the same aims same thoughts and same dreams. Ya in some cases those were amplified and in some cases not amplified but OK. Now everyone of them wanted to be THE ENGINEER.

In this crew of 2500 students there was one fellow who was similar to Buffalo {if you talk about look}..... similar to Shiv Khera if you talk about thoughts {Note : I don't like shiv khera} ... similar to Saif Ali Khan of "Dil Chahta Hai " {if you exclude the wealth saif was having though the movie was not released until then }...... Similar to many unwanted disease which you never ever imagine for you. But a big butt :P he was a good Friend of liquor group, smoker group, and all other banned group of hostel. He was the first servant of the most notorious grand senior of our batch. He was the only one who been allotted a room not with us but with grand Seniors. So many unwanted, undesirable and unimaginable things happened to him in a very first year. I cant say much about these consequences with which he met but yes my opinion for him was that he is spoilt bread and in one line i say i hated him in first due to various reasons. Which i explained above.

But how come it affects him if he is the protongonist of the story so ... in the very first year what he did in the college was more indulging in the activity which i mentioned more grouping, more investment in terms of time and money to the group and :) and gossiping.

Sorry but i am not able to control my feelings about him and if i say that somebody if then would have come to me and ask what you say about his perforamnce .. i must said that he is going to be zero. But neither others nor the god has given a shit to my predictions and he was among the toppers in my batch. So this was the first success he got and by the end of the year few things which being genralized for him was as under:

1. He is good in planning.
2. He is good in partying.
3. He is good in team.
4. He is good in Cricket.
5. He has a best group of mit as a friend circle.

So above was the first year. And great achivements. Bravo. Mr. PlanMan.

This is a unanimous believe that second year brings a 3 fold swing to the first year students and same happened. Those who were the entrants in the notorious group became the shotters of that groups and the group was having there name on them. Which resulted in n number of Deciplinry action against him and other members means the guy who was just a beginner became the leader thanx the authorities and here comes the real realtion between me and the Hero of the story. Everytime anything wrong been done in the hostel or in the college or any where there few culprits which were undoubtly captured and fortunately me and the hero was among them. Though the reasons being in the same natorious group which i hated earlier was different but the result was same and the outcome of the result was a bond in between me and the "Buffalo". And this way we started our professional cum personal joint vanture. Here if i will not mention few names then the story will be a shear fake so here it comes ....the cast and the crew of MIT moradabads notorious cum famous cum admirable group:

amitesh, divas, divakar, kohsheen, ashish batra, amraendra pandey , bipin bajpee, vivek tiwari, anurag soni, dheeraj singh. Though my name should be the last in the group :P but as i am a writer so i can put it in the middle or front or any where which i feel comfortable.

So by the end of the second year we all had set a history which i hope some times people of Ram Ganga Vihar, Harthala, Line Paar, Amar Ujjala News paper, Dean and EC HOD office, MIT Football ground used to mesmerize and neighbours of MIT Boys Hostel used to memorize specially "Tilak bhavan's " Front and side neighbours. :P For our extremely social affairs.

So the hero celebrated his second year of engineering. and became the 50% engineer in 2004.